Moving slowly through the grass my feet parting the blade like leaves as I move ever forward.
Words from the past echo in my mind 'you always stick to your guns'
Opinions all different blur and merge into a background DIN I chose to ignore to the upset of many.
I know who I am now and what it is I have to do.
Many will not like it and others will no understand. In time others will be engulfed by envy and jealousy.
None will distract me.
For none know how dark the furthest reaches of the human mind are and what constitutes suffering to a human being.
I visited these places and I returned. Many could not...maybe none at all.
I returned with many goals that would ache the passage of time.
On my journey there would be those that ask and I will have to tell. It is not easy.
The explanations of the deviations of my mind are none too easy for me.
To put them in to words.
The eyes glaze and the R-Complex kicks in.
The primate emerges and longs to move onto the next thing to entertain the boredom.
But my path continues ever onwards.
Much has come at me over the years and much sought to fell me.
A lean to the right and a swerve to the left and at times the pressure disturbed tiny hairs upon my ears.
The passion is strong.
There were people in need and none more so than my own blood.
I'm already aware there is no help, I am aware that those that exist are merely charades to fool us.
I am alone. Very alone.
Intoxication was my release and at last the flickers of signals flowed between synapses.
Profound and other worldly were my thoughts.
Puzzles were just mere obstacles to the place beyond I needed to be.
My history fantastical my survival begs belief but here I stand before you.
This time around things will be very different.
I am here to provide messages to you and yours that will last beyond a lifetime.
Words and actions form a man that will reverberate through time.
With luck smiling the message will last beyond an unimaginable time that will help all who come and those that listen.
Even if the listening feels an eternity.
The apes and primates are drawn back to the table to learn and to know all.
They will become wiser and more open to understand.
They will realise that which blocked there view and learn to see through it.
For that is the ultimate goal of knowledge it is to be discovered.
We are inquisitive and we will discover it.
I think of the length of string then think of the theory of string theorised to create all around us.
How to message all and in what way to be profound.
Drawn on my love of philosophy I have to keep searching for the way through the mire.
It is all that I see and all that is available to me.
Without it I am nothing, mere existence on a physical plane of misery that many too suffer.
There has to be more..there IS more to all this and this is not all that there is.
I see a sea of changes but not how they implement. It is change and it is not the end.
Change is what people fear their R-Complexes kick into overload and they back off.
Times long past and the process of learning is never changing.
Much greater and more challenging things must be taken on little by little.
Over an eon the fragments merge into a bigger picture of understanding.
Talk. Communication with other beings allows more of the picture to take shape.
Speaking with others reduces the fear that the heart of their minds creates to cause them to retaliate to safety.
It is the way of things.
It is the nature of things.
It will be for some time to come.
It is purely a time engaging thing the process of adaption.
My mind is a quandary of many things and many thoughts and not all is revealed to anyone.
I have my R-Complex and I have my battles but I am further down the road and therefore see.
But telling a small child that the flames hurt is never understood until the intense heat is revealed.
One want is to show before the pain and hope that conclusions are drawn independently.
For the ravishes of time will take there toll on all.
Nerves of all all slowly fraying and becoming raw to the touch.
The blades of grass part as my feet sway through them and I ponder.
What does it take?
How to communicate and spare the glazing to speed up the process.
Bathed in sunshine with nature surrounding I ponder these thoughts.
People breeze by alone or in conversation, blind to what is around them.
The sea of green is all the feel they need and understanding is not.
Conversation has priority over all what price and what location.
The world around them hustles by.
My journey continues on and my search for a pathway through continues unabated.
It is but a maze and a maze but a puzzle and puzzles become a breeze.
Time is the only enemy. For all the time in the world is not what I have.
More correctly put it is not what we have.
But I endeavour to continue to clear the way for all to see.
Many will come to fell the young tree they fear.
But the young tree bends easier now and learns to go around.
I will serve but never sway and never falter.
Only now stretched out before me my vision captures glimpses of rays of light.
These are my goals and they are the reason I have travelled so far.
Now I travel with god-speed towards the light.