Monday, 23 December 2013

THE NEVER ENDING NARCISSISM

As always I am having some difficulties with the run up to Christmas.

As per usual people want me to perform tasks that I either cannot do or cannot do and will make me groggy, dizzy and sick feeling for most of Christmas Day.

This means that as well as not listening certain people have been incapable of not reading either and I do not mean this blog either.

The problem that people face today is that everyone, or almost everyone, carries something with then that is not used anywhere near half its potential, the smartphone. As those who have followed and paid attention they have already refused that I have done things with phones, one and sometimes more, with phones most people, outside of computer geeks, could not dream up. To great effect to at times even if no one in authority wants to admit to their existence and source for whatever reason. Yet among my friends and family I was unusually very late to the smartphone party. Very late. Yet despite this most use their phone for the obvious things and so obviously only appear nothing more than a fashion accessory. Some are not even familiar with the choices within settings despite being on the fourth smartphone. But none of this matters. What does, however, is the fact that in the last few weeks it is that very app used mitre than anything else that they have failed to use. Indeed every smartphone is built around one single solitary thing in ever smarter ways. SEARCHING.

These days many of the latest phones can search using voice alone and even touching the screen is slowly going being edged out in favour of gesturing, which I think is much better provided it is implemented skilfully. Unfortunately their are too many cooks about and the food is often rancid to begin with.

What I am ever so slowly getting at is that everyone loves to search, of Google as some still call it. It is right there in their pocket and within arms reach 95% of the time but the only thing I glean from things that people say our do is that they have failed to do this. In my regards at any rate.

This would not otherwise bother me but when suddenly things are expected of me that are clearly either impossible or detrimental then I will get annoyed. That is with anyone related to me.

Then consider a bunch of people who are not only not related to me but their sole purpose and reason for their salaries is to help and support people like me? My next post will explain that at the very beginning of the year I am going to set a number of things in motion. These will be with organisations I have dealt with before and there to help people like me as I already said. In so doing I will prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that all previous correspondence I was being honest and that I am weeks away from rubber stamping this with an official stamp. Though I do not need to, now. I have the condition and the years of letters regarding the symptoms. Disregarding this now they will no doubt realise make then look utterly guilty of their lies, trucks and acts of inhumanity against the British public. What they do not know is that I have already done exactly that, but rest assured I will declare this blog to them in mid battle because this can sometimes force the most hilarious actions and statements. Even if it is at the expense of dumb front line staff or on occasion my own.

In fact while I was typing this out I ended up being asked by three people. Now what is expected of me is a short list of things. But first of I should state that my recent prescription of Amitriptyline has list it's effect as i stated recently and that the returning pain had been quite bad and wise than it was previously. I think I now why because while the pain had receded I was capitalising on this.

I should have foreseen that as nothing lasts forever and I am used to just not being that lucky.

Now another problem I have is the sleeping thing which is in itself complicated...

I have trouble sleeping, both getting to sleep and at times starting asleep. I also trend to wait up with a full and painful bladder which now send to have garnered the attention of my newest GP. If not treated carefully I can go without much sleep which will then make many of my symptoms worse.

Now as they are currently worse than they have even been I am a little more wary about my condition than I normally am.

But I am expected to go off and just spend my Christmas period sleeping in places that do not have enough beds with the living room sofa permanently occupied?!

Now made the above points very clear. I have also made it very clear that I have now pinpointed and certain of what I am afflicted with. I also prove it on this blog.

Now bearing in mind that today is Christmas Eve (2013 in case this is read years later by fellow Fibromyalgia sufferers) and we have the worst weather in many years leading at my house. It had been torrential rain since I woke up, annoyingly late I might add. There had also been a very strong wind whipping around all day making the rain sound like gravel against my house.

So imagine how annoying it is when I just notice a text message starting can I travel to someones house, two buses, as picking me up tomorrow would be too much?!

I wonder if a Fibromyalgia Society might contact me with the offer of emailing my family and knocking them on the head with the proverbial brick to try and get the message home to them?

I have to admit that the lines coming from that one get more and more bizarre with each year that passes and only their own realities seen to matter at all.

Had any one of them taken the time to actually read my last few posts or anything on Fibromyalgia, you can download books from Amazon, Kobo or iTunes for like £1.50 odd, they would realise not only everything I have ever did was true and that I cannot do these things they expect if me midst of the time. When I say I can't it means I can't, it does not mean I can really do cartwheels, it means I BLOODY WELL CAN'T.

Jesus Christ I would NEVER rely on them as witnesses I can tell you, three are so bloody astringent, annoying and self obsessed that I tell you I will get through the whole of 2014 without a single word or text about what I have just posted here?!

Bearing in mind that the one complaining they cannot pick Mr up dies not drive, Lol. One lives 5 minutes away and does drive. One lives half way between me and my destination tomorrow and also drives. My destination is a twenty minute drive.

Well I say my destination... but I am quite happy to stay hear but this is because sometimes Luke's to be centre of attention and all their health problems are far greater than anyone else's.

I would never say that but when I am nagged to do things that are being my capability, or will cause me a lot of pain or make me feel like shot for 24 to 48 hours I end up writing chapter and verse. If someone insinuates there's is just as bad or worse I will repeat the chatters and verses.

Indeed just a few nights ago I was reading out lines from a book after hearing about their condition for the umpteenth time.

Now remember I am reading from a book! A book I have on my tablet and had been there several days. I am reading it because I have just had things stated to me about me doing this I should when I have spent YEARS telling them I simply cannot. Now I can actually read from a series of books and weird for weird exactly how I described things for many a year. I read how I need more money than the average person and need help just to get through the day. I then said about how you cannot tell when your over doing it and should not do to much. I also said that you should not do to little either and even explained why I used to exercise as I felt better. Now I am reading this out from a book and could read it out from several. So try to work out the reaction I got from reading this when they said...

"Well I am not supposed to do anything with my epilepsy but I do!"

Which basically means i should completely ignore signals from my body for thirteen years as well as that of the top experts who have written down the facts in books. No you should just do what is expected of you, from someone who used to call the government fascist slave drivers?! Lol!

For some bloody reason the others will bow to this person and I will get messages asking to to perform somersaults?!

I would dearly love to get into a group of people who have had similar things but I have to admit they would need to be related to someone equally as narcissistic as my particular family member and that would be hard to find and if I did.., oooh I would feel so sorry for you, I really would. LOL.

Anyway to the question of doing somersaults I simply answered with one word with one upper case letter and one lower case letter. No exclamation marks, no sarcastic comments or anything else just that one word. They shed a question and the true and simple answer is, No.

But it will likely turn into something now and there will be some things said because I cannot do these somersaults? Guarantee it and this has been happening for years and will do for the next year too. It will cause conversations a plenty that will go on for his and trustfully over many months. There will be text messages about it all and some bad words said to and maybe even arguments.

Minutes, hours, weeks, months and years?!

All because they do not listen and cannot spend 30 minutes reading a book?

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