Monday, 30 December 2013


God an awful title but I am tired.

In fact that is what this post is about really. Becoming tired suddenly and bouts of pain.

I left the house today to do a couple of things. One if these was to drop a couple of things off at the new GP surgery he actually wanted to see and a few things he will not expect.

On the way there I was relieved that the pain was a little easier than it had been the previous few days but soon I regretted thinking this.

In the town things came on suddenly. I was aching strongly throughout my lower body from my feet through my calf muscles thighs up through my buttocks and along my back. Only my shoulder, his and knees were not playing up.

I was also feeling weak and tired and brute long nauseous too. I bought a female to female connector from Maplin for a rip off price of £8 when I normally avoid them. It was for a keyboard fur the tablet I got from Amazon for £3.00 but should not have bothered as it does not bloody work.

I waste so much money trying to save it out would be cheaper to just but the new expensive one to begin with?!

To emphasize this I am currently looking for a camera sling backpack, again, because the one I bought previously I cannot get my Tegra Note 7 inch tablet into, grrrr. As a result I have but been going out with my camera and have missed several dozen photo opportunities. Drat!

I have now purchased two backpacks and regret buying each one. All because they were cheap. The Lowepro sling was 26 instead of 50 but I bought the smallest one, 102, when I was likely better off with the 202 which us a but bigger.

Oddly enough the one I originally wanted was a Kata model that would have been perfect, plus you can change the strap from left shoulder to right which would be a big help in my shoulders, especially my right shoulder.

It is very true that no one could possibly even begin to guess what this condition is like and it is literally a living hell, make no mistake.

Hopefully my latest application for help will be awarded and I have done one application but have to do a few more over the next couple of days.

A freedom pass is next which is perfect because the council are currently taking me to court, but ignoring my emails thus far, lol!

Back to the town and things were getting surprisingly hard and it got so that I just wanted to collapse and die as I attended to get around. I accomplished nothing and had forgotten what I wanted to do. I managed to get a large can of Monster drink which I had not had in months and a double Mars bar as I wanted to take another 1000mg Paracetamol and 100mg of Tramadol despite taking the same amount an hour our so earlier but I did not care.

This is how I have ended up taking most of my overdoses to try and stop whatever it was from bring unbearable and because I have been prescribed the wrong drugs for over 12 years. The Doctors all new this and yet failed to spot the deliberate mistake.

I was going to avoid going to my friends store and just go home but the store was very close and the thought of sitting down, though there is hardly anywhere to sit, was too much to resist.

Once in the store I sat upon a section if tree trunk I had not noticed before and eventually the pills had an effect.

I told my friends how bad it had got yet did not feel as bad as lady few days when I left the house!

Tomorrow I have to attend the surgery for another blood test in as many weeks. This blood test is, however, the first in a series to rule out everything before I an sent to Guys Hospital. Though I think with what I left him today and my medical records turning up soon I think he will quickly realise the tests are pointless?

I left him the results of the Nerve Conduction Studies and Electromyography which itself proves that I was in the advanced and likely lady if the tests left available. After all he did state he would be very interested to see the results. A I had a spare copy the Neurologist never received I dropped him one off.

But when you are having days like the one I did today you cannot help but start becoming a little edgy and temperamental when your start thinking that they are going to force you to spend months jumping through the same old hoops yet again before they will even consider referring me.

It will not go the same way again I assure you off that. I will be quite blunt this time around.

It is damn scary to think you sure on the verge of slowing to a full stop and there is no fecker about to help and support you.

Very scary.

Oh well, I will do it all again tomorrow!


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