Tuesday 28 October 2014

THE FINAL CURTAIN PART TWO

I finally got to Barnet Hospital's Accident & Emergency department yesterday. It went well... eventually.

I was told a couple of tests and its over. To overcome the boredom I typed out a narration of sorts below...

Well I am currently in Barnet Hospital's Accident and Emergency and as I told reception I am for days late getting here.

Well I say I am in A&E but the sign in the wall says urgent care centre?! I have been to Barnet two or maybe three times but have never been to the A&E before yet I remember an incident with a headphone silicone ear piece but that was nowhere near this department. This is at the very rear of the hospital, guessing facing west? The waiting room has dressing faces two directions and before me is a door starting 'Urgent Care Centre' above it where nurses and other plain clothed people emerge and call out patients names.

Confusingly there is a door to the immediate right of me that appears to have a waiting room? No sign above the door describing it and I cannot help but wonder if that is the A&E waiting room?

Of much more interest to me which had me raise an eyebrow is that on either side of the door to the unknown waiting room is a A4 laminated sign staying that patients and visitors are not allowed to photograph and film the hospital. Ooh yes it's so tempting to pull my phone out and photograph that as I imagine the ironic nature that particular post would have. But I cannot be bothered this time around... but that can suddenly change.
I paused there for a moment because I heard a ruckus. It says a woman's voice followed by a man's. I then looked up and see a lady in grey saying "I told you I hurt my back!" followed by a portly gentleman with his hands behind her shepherding her towards the exit. She stated that she had no money for a taxi and he stated it was 'bit his problem!' Hmm 'Lady in Grey' sounds like a good title for the post? 

I don't know what the problem was but I had to feel for her. The waiting room is fully packed and it was embarrassing. Especially when the large gentleman said what he did. I hate waiting if it turns out to be a long time. They should give you badges with your name on on big letters and then you could listen to music. But then again as I find is always the case and never been able to figure it out, that is that they can call out the names and never get an answer? Sometimes this could be two or three names in a row?!

Also quite peculiar today and changing the subject slightly is the weather. It is incredibly warm and I have a tee shirt on and could easily have worn shorts! Well it is somewhere around the 26th or 27th October, I'm an idiot and is the 27th! It is apparently going to stay like this for stay days while I understand that Scotland has been pummelled with excrement heavy rain and still is! I dare say the news and tabloids will be awash with stories, pictures and films of people being flooded out? They do love a dreadful heartbreaking story but only if it comes with great visuals and not too serious or big that you rock the boat too much and upset those they are affiliated with who hasn't very deep pockets and want to keep them this way.

That was just a little pop at the news media there and I am not quite sure how many more of those I am going to be able to make? Hopefully I might know by the time I have this this little post.

That peculiar sign has large font for the words "No photos, please" before it goes on to explain you cannot film either. Very odd.  Cannot help but wonder if this is because of me? After all this was ground zero for the early stages and I think might have been the first actual hospital I recorded before moving on to others like St. Michael's, Royal Free, Guy's and others. Though now I think about it it cannot be as that would have to be Chase Farm, surely?

Still it is close enough to ground zero to be a extremely likely factor?

Damn, I should have made a note of what time I came in here. I am also annoyed at one of my own and rare oversights that has only just occurred.

There seems to be no Wifi in the hospital either which is very bizarre? There are a couple of the usual BT Wifi hotshots that want you to pay £4 for a bloody hour?! Hmm mauve if I had ordered the BT Affinity I could log onto them for free? Double damn!

Also one reason I took so long is I needed a bath before I came up here which I only managed to force to do this morning. However I am stuck with someone that makes me want to put on a Peter Griffin voice while standing in his kitchen conversing with his son Chris while trying to work with daughter Meg on the animated comedy called 'Handy Quacks" by standing up and saying then shouting "She's got BO, SHE'S GOT BO!!" before hiding being the back of my chair! Lol. I do not know what the gendre of the source of the dreadful BO is as they are behind me somewhere and looking won't make the smell evaporate. Lol.

It feels like I have been here an hour and ten minutes have passed by since I first realised I had not logged the time. Ooh but now I seem to remember looking at my watch after I got off the bus and it was just after 2pm.

So just over an hour then and all I can think of doing to pass the time away is type this out! Suffering sticklebacks!

I am also being bugged by Android while doing this because as well as the usual spelling corrections it gets wrong and the changing of words into this that do not exist and typing out 'I' to which it mostly changes into another vowel Android seems to think its a word,  like 'O'  and 'U' it keeps stopping my typing to tell me that the 'Play Service has stopped responding'!

Oops just got called in, ticked off for not going in sooner and the words I expected to hear which I thought were the words I was sure did not want to alarm me with...' STOMACH CANCER'. So now my second wait until a nurse calls me to do some tests.

Yeah to be honest I did not want to put the words of the number one suspect at the very top of the list online. Because it may have been something else to what I was originally thinking, while also different to what the Doctor was thinking.

Colitis and Crohn's Disease were two suspects on the list with a few others but I had ruled the out basepoint the symptoms I had missing from their list.

Also I had long suspected my Uncle had died from this and I heard it was bad but kept quiet. Each time I was heaving up vomit and excreting razor blades from my rear I remembered my grandmother telling me how her father died of it and it was pretty bad.
So my Uncle and my Great Grandfather in the branch I studied carried the Fibromyalgia genetics, died of Stomach Cancer?
This was far too much a coincidence and you can imagine what theory? Right for annoyed there with Android and went into settings to override their smug faces and attitudes... well was going to say I stopped all their 'Play Services' but the message came up again. Hence why I did smugness because they know jack shit but think they know better then everyone else in the world?

That master race shit again.

Turned off Wifi now see if that stops it happening? I like the way they do not offer you the report feature, like saying "oh no, it can't possssssibly be our software at fault?! Other people's Apps maybe but not ours, no way.!" Lol.

When I returned to the waiting area I was greeted with the sight and sounds of someone trying to be revived! A nurse shouting a name at an unconscious lady in a wheelchair with the family standing their and as I found another seat I looked up to see her being wheeled away.

I hope nothing untoward happens though her family did not appear to be overly concerned.

I have just seen portly boy walk through and out the door and turns out he is security.
Hmm just looked at the clock and I wonder how long there is to wait and whether or not there will be another wait as well as the pondering about whether I will have to stay.
Oddly enough this is the first time in my life I have ever walked into hospital with things in my bag in case I am kept in. My Inguinal Hernia operation does not count and I just realised that I was not supposed to stay in over night on that one but did.

I actually had to fumble things a bit too with the recording device as I did not want to leave it on as I could be here a long time. Added to this though I did bring back up battery power I did not think about a plug in charger! Moron!

A bit worrying is I have had few a few twinges of abdominal pain too and do not want the incident like the other night to repeat itself. I forgot to ask the Doctor I saw of the was somewhere quiet and secluded I could wait! Moron!

Someone is concerned and complaining about someone and is a lady soaking about her mum I think. Cannot help wonder if it's that lady in grey?

Luckily the pain is on and off and only mild. If it stays like this is nothing.

Oops, got called in again. Also fumbled again too! Still nothing untoward say said and oddly I now find myself waiting for a third time? Bizarre and I do not think I have ever had to wait three times before? I am sure of it.

On this occasion I had my blood pressure taken and my temperature. I also find out that the Paramedic that arrived at my house say an emergency response unit they send ahead in emergencies in case someone is legally dying and to make sure that they do not. 
I asked how long he had worked at the hospital and he said six years. He asked, once again, both what was happening, umm, and why I had not come sooner? UMM, feeling mule a stuck record here and that's when I explained that I had phoned '111'and had an ambulance act to me. Plus I previously thought this was Fibromyalgia and once again explained me theory. The first Doc, I just remembered, said Fibromyalgia dies not cause Diarrhea and I said "Oh yes it does Doc, trust me on that and it can cause consultation too! I know it's poorly understood by a great many Doctors and I have a high amount of knowledge in this area."

While I was typing that paragraph there was an announcement over the loudspeaker by the hospital staff who asked in a very sarcastic manner, which I thought was not only funny but a waste of time, when suddenly two Arab speaking...gentlemen who got up to move their car! Lol!

Oops called in again just as I moments away from explaining that I have to have some blood tests along with an ECG. The ECG mention raised my eyebrow again and any more people might mistake me for Roger Moore?!

Oh the previous nurse just popped his head around the curtain and said "Oh! Your here? Blood?" "Yes" I replied and he said "Good!"

I am now telephoned to a seat in the waiting area again. The very lovely nurse told me that my ECG was normal, as this was performed by her in there, and when I asked what it was for she stated my heart rate was high, odd as I did not notice anything myself and told her that. I am not scared nor nervous in anyway so it should not be high. Though as I was walking back to the waiting area I did think that maybe this had something to do with me feeling hyped up, hard wired and fidgety all the time?

I have put this dien to the Fibromyalgia and oddly is something I have wanted to bring up with my new GP but keep forgetting to! Bum and bugger!

Hmm now there seems to be a Policeman here sitting next to a guy and listening to him tell a story. Oh in actual fact and in a unintended sexist fashion I failed to see the the Policeman is actually sitting in front of him to the left and immediately left of him sits a tiny Policewoman. My apologies if anyone reading this are themselves a Policewoman. If it's you reading this your very cute! Lol.

Well I say Police but they could be those plastic Police? But I can see their numbers on their shoulders and I doubt the Plastics would handle finding out how someone ended up in hospital?

So a look at the clock again and this time it is 4.42pm and I sit here waiting for the big one. The test result that tells me whether or not I have stomach cancer. I think the nurse was surprised I knew what they suspected? Well it's not rocket science and before I even turned to the Internet and '111' the right had occurred to me. Like I said I thought I was dying I was in that much pain and would not have liked anyone I was related to, to witness what I was going through. God of I had a partner that genuinely cared about me I dead to think of putting someone through that! Watching me in these moments.

A little nugget there as I always find a way to get one in and so easy to do with my life, lol.

I find myself right now in a similar moment to one I lived a decade ago.

I looked up and suddenly wondered at being called. The caller of my name would have my test result and if positive have something of a burden out upon them. I suddenly flashed back to the vision of my father arriving at Chase Farm Hospital in an ambulance. He had sadly had already died and I did not get told this so did not know. I saw his eyes as the trolley he was in went by and the thought he may be dead crossed my mind. An Eon seemed to go by before I felt a hand in my shoulder from someone who walked by me while focusing hard not to make sure contact with me. I will never forget the look on their faces as I followed them into 'The Quiet Room' and sat me down. One half of me was telling myself I was imagining things but was beaten down by the intelligent side.

Well I just got called in again and had my heart rate checked again as well as my stomach using a stethoscope and horror of horrors while the blood results are still wanting they want to do thread dreaded finger probe of death and embarrassment! Noooo, suddenly stomach Cancer dies not seem ask that bad?! Lol.

Damn it?! Now I have Peter bloody Griffin in my head doing his prostate exam!

Damn it! I got to the word 'prostrate' adove and he returned and I have in. Bizarrely it hurt but there was nothing of concern. My word I am desperate to find out what this is and put a stop to it! Like I told an anaesthetist once , "I don't care if you kill me, just don't cause me any body pain!" to which she said "and don't disk like that you will be fine!"  My only operation to study of my first Inguinal Hernia.

My teleportation is working over time as while typing out that last paragraph I find myself bash in the waiting room for the.... umm third time? Wait! No the fifth time! Lol. A bit shocked to see it is dark outside too. It is 5.15pm.

The latest Doctor who did the prostate exam thing.... brrrr.... told me that he did not think it was anything to worry about before then telling me he had requested a 'new' blood test to add to the others, or other? He then stated that I would have to go back to the GP, too late to make an appointment now, and be referred off to endoscopy as my oesophagus could be causing bleeding. That's new!

So I am still babbling away like a moron on my tablet pc using the word processor on my OfficeSuite Pro App (note to self :have you any idea how bloody boring you have sounded?!).

Well I assume the blood tests, or blood test, will rule out the stomach Cancer?
Damn it! Now I have teleported again only this time includes three stop offs after some quite unexpected things happening, or actually to be more descriptive being told.. or asked.

I get called in by the rather charming and extremely nice nurse I met earlier and I'm not complaining. Then she tells me they want some more tests and I think his odd this is as I was told that the blood test results would be the last and I'm outta here?! The right I would be kept in had long since evaporated and I was trying to remember nearby shops that might do Oyster Card top-ups because I cannot remember... no wait I think it was £1.55? Will I half better check. But I get asked for a urine sample, though this could be something shady by the hospital or rather NHS bosses? I then get told I need to go for an X-Ray too and for a few seconds I am confused and utter "X-Ray? Oh!" as I realise it's over me suspecting I had broken my own rib or torn ligaments/tendons away from one. So a quick visit to the lavatory and now I am in a different waiting room while they get preheated beige calling my name. Well I say that because there s only one person here waiting and may have anyway been called? While sitting here the petite Policewoman and her partner along with the chap they are escorting about have come in and sat down to my left.

I have already handed the request firm to someone while leaning on the door frame of a quite peculiar reception. The chap before me had been called in so not long hopefully and I will be outta here?!

Yup done and I'm back to the original waiting room for the... hmm again. Hopefully not long now and my daughter had text me so I better answer.

Whoa that was quick. The finger of death called me back in before long. Turns out I am OK add far as sudden death is concerned. Which is bloody handy because I was worried about going under any general anaesthetic in hospital as I would have had to have made some phonecalls to do with this blog in case anything... let's just say untoward happened. I had not actively put anything in place in case my number ever came up. I just kept putting it off.

I explained what happened to my daughter who then read the message that I actually had stomach Cancer and I just to quickly correct her. I did not want to tell anyone what the tests were for especially my daughter who had a mother who went through that worked her way through the A to Z of cancers over around ten years or more. With literally one that she actually told me she had she is doing exceptionally well with it. I was told about it umm, let me see 9 years ago? Apparently 75% of those suffering with this untreatable cancer do not make it beyond five years. Yup she is doing well.

So yes I hardly wanted to do that to my daughter. Of course once the tests were in I could explain why.

I'm in the clear where death is concerned. But there is still the diagnosis to discover. I wonder if it was a combination of things? Two things could explain the symptoms and I had never thought of this earlier. The bleeding from the oesophagus seems to be the favourite presently and maybe my original thought of food poisoning? Maybe the latter could have caused the former for instance? I had better be extremely careful with my diet for awhile. Which is a pain in the arse thing to do without help in all honesty. Literally physical help as well as financial, hence just one of many reasons I have battled with the DWP for years.

Despite my all clear I could not help but think of all those that do get diagnosed with stomach cancer. I never looked into it in any depth but it enough to scare my grandmother half to death and fear Doctors and hospitals fire the next fifty years. I don't know if he was still alive while my father was a child but my Dad had the exact same fears. This also extended to dentists.

Therefore I was a bit of a surprise to them at first my ability to endure pain and then think nothing of going to a Doctors, Dentists or hospital when it got too much. There was a situation or two they saw me in baits bad states due to hospital ops that had them convinced I would then develop an aversion.

Not going to Doctors led to them dying before their time, though there were other... factors involved too.

I cannot imagine enduring that amount of pain that I did for too long. If this is what is involved with Stomach Cancer I am amazed it due bit get more media attention. But then maybe drugs today are a lot better at keeping the pain down?

Oh I just remembered that my X-rays were clear so I can go back, at least I think I can,  to stating that I have never broken a bone. Lol.

The can gets kicked further down the long and dusty road. 

Wow I typed it something to make Tolstoy blush while I was in hospital and I did not even start immediately! Lol. Imagine if I'd been there a few days?

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