CRUNCHING THE NUMBERS

So the NHS' workforce is at 'crunch point' .. again?!

This is a report by the General Medical Council so not sure I'd trust it if I were you?

I had a run in with them a few years back where not only did they not help at all, asking with the PHSO who barefaced lied, but actually helped a GP Surgery back in Enfield who I had reported as lying to me, along with Chase Farm Hospital.

It's hard to explain how you feel when you actually catch someone lying to you. Many know this .. can hurt .. a lot.

But when it's the one person in the world you think you can trust and themselves sworn an oath to protect you and heal you .. it's a shock in a way that's hard to describe.

Then it gets worse when they suggest your a liar or when they doesn't .. that tour suffering with a mental health problem and are suddenly offered the psychiatrists you had trouble seeing years earlier for a different problem, that doesn't have you imagining things.

The hilarious part about it, well now that is, is that the psychiatrist I'd seen earlier had confirmed her own suspicions that sine very bizarre things were going on between the government, the DWP and the NHS.

She explained how all mental health patients had suddenly been cut loose and that no one had informed anyone in her clinic.

She also said that I'm not a mental health patients like her others and didn't need to keep going back there!

I was later listed as having a Generalised Anxiety Disorder that I of course later found out was not strictly true and that the Fibromyalgia I'd had that was causing me several pains in me feet was responsible.

The damning post was that I'd suffered with Fibromyalgia for like twenty years already and it had been missed.

What was even more damning was that it was missed for another five years until I self diagnosed it .. discovered it was behind dozens of other symptoms I'd been to Doctors and Hospitals for and even then .. they tried very, very hard to avoid a diagnosis.

Except they had already been prescribing me two unrelated drugs that both have positive effects on it. Proving to me on my mind that they had already known what it was for at least two years.

So what did the General Medical Council do?

Told my then GP that if he spoke to me on that way again i'd knock his teeth out. Except and as I told them .. I had absolutely no plans on ever returning. Despite the fact I as now convinced that more than 75% of Doctors lie .. I was still not going back to one that I had caught lying.

Oh did I mention the part where the GP refused to listen to the recorded proof that they had lied?! 

That is just one recording of many of the NHS lying. GMC wasn't interested in that.

They had not factored in my blog though and since then I keep seeing them piping up and stating things .. far too late and after the proverbial horse had bolted. As is usual work all these bodies.

I thought about calling this post 'The Toilet Post' because it is where I was where I could actually get some peace to think and type. The following one did not get that!

I saw this on the BBC and thought you should see it: NHS workforce 'at crunch point' - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-42397853

CLIMBING UP, SPIRALLING DOWN

This spinning limbo just never seems to end.

That might some like a throw away line but it is the 6^th November, 2016 today and the likelihood is that it WILL last between 2 and 6 weeks longer and started back on the 19^th July.

Though there is an argument it started long before that. The assessment date I never attended.

That might seem the reason why to some people except for two things.

If your not aware of it every single assessment is a cheat. After all why would my GP now announce out of the blue when I ask him whether or not I am fit for work any more he says it is the job of the DWP?

The other reason is that I have NEVER attended an assessment, at least not for over ten years. I think I attended one in a place called Lisson Grove around 13 years ago when the first of the pains in my feet started to affect me. Except I never realised at the time I was thirteen years away form diagnosing what this was and that it would be ME that diagnosed it. Oh and do not get any stupid ideas about that as it was later confirmed by Guy's Hospital,, if you did not already know this.

I will never forget the patronising roll of eyes and “Huh” when I answered no to not being assessed for PIP by Judge Miss Mark of the HMCTS … though I myself use the term 'Judge' loosely here as in my opinion she was a bade one on a number of levels. Not impartial for a start. DWP not having Doctors and everyone knows it coming in second and the list goes on.

I now realise that there is an absolute NEED for Judges to go through a list with a defendant as to WHAT evidence they have received from you, in are there is a mistake or they are lost in the post.

Now you might ask yourself what is it that makes me state that this is a need? Well because currently it looks like they have booked three separate court hearings with at least two different judges for the exact same thing!

So I am around the ten week mark into the debacle that is the DWP's major fuck up into trying to cheat me, along with many others, tick me, make me go away and get out of a period of time of paying me nothing. Their lows know no bounds and this has become shockingly evident since I found a list of people that have died by their hands that is over 70 people long.

Still … it takes focus away from the fact that for the last decade or two the UK population has been expanding rapidly and the numbers coming here to live has been outgrowing the expanding and they have built zero, or almost zero, in the way of social housing. Yeah … that was fucking smart!

I bet the EU never thought of that when they were telling everyone what to do?

So my rent is currently around a week late and two months back it was two weeks late! That is actually my biggest concern.

Two weeks ago I was at my Doctors and I asked for my prescriptions and got turned down for that too! Apparently I was early but I have a very difficult time keeping track of everything. I did not check my pills but knew that I had not picked up a prescription for a while and BECAUSE of my memory … well, I asked when I was there.

So what happened? I kept forgetting to put in my repeat prescription until I had ran out of Propranalol, the ery thing that keeps the anxiety attacks at bay.

Friday night and morning I had not taken a Propranalol pill as I had to go over the weekend without any so I had left one single pill in the blister pack. I figured I would go one day without one and take it Saturday, yesterday, and then I only have to go one more day without one. I was more worried about withdrawal symptoms since an episode around 11 or 12 years ago when I forgot to take Venlafaxine for two days. Yup that was how far back my anxiety attacks go and that was in no way the first. The first was many years before that. Yet another thing linked to my Fibromyalgia I was not going to find out for a very long time, this time more than 15 years until I self diagnosed Fibromyalgia Syndrome.

Over the time I have been posting and mentioned my Fibromyalgia I might have given the false impression that I have suffered with it for 13 or 14 years. No. That was when it affected my feet and I experienced what I call 'Reversed Plantar Fasciitis'. Even the painful Achilles Tendinitis pains went back before the Plantar Fasciitis pain, long before. Back then I only had to be careful coming down stairs as if they were steep I had a 50/50 chance in the snapping pain.

When I had forgotten to take the Venlafaxine I started to feel really, really ill and really, really dizzy. I hod gone out to do a job for my brother while ill, got back and laid on a sofa for twenty minutes when I suddenly realised I had not taken the pills for two days and wondered if it was down to that? I took them and within 30 minutes I felt much better.

This was the only time I was ever affected by withdrawal symptoms and it was enough to make me remain very wary of ever having them again.

So when I ran out of Propranalol I was like 'SHIT!'

A good example of my memory problem? Yeah well it got better.

I was changing to wearing a different jacket and as I did so I checked all the pockets of the one I was previously wearing. When I did I remembered there were pills in one of the inside pockets I had forgotten about, but did not remember what they were. As I felt them I thought 'oh these will be Amitriptyline and Tramadol'. Except when I pulled them out they weren't these. They were more Propranalol.

Now I know what you might think? 'Oh so you did not run out of pills when you thought you did and the GP was right?' Umm .. well in a word 'no'.

You see I ended up in Accident & Emergency at North Middlesex Hospital awhile ago now, a month maybe? When I did I had several things stated to me, one that I posted about at the time was that the DWP should NOT be coming anywhere near me with my medical records and put his head in his hands and stated “What ARE the publicc services DOING in this country?!” The other thing he sis was question WHY my Doctor had given me the Propranalol pills that he did, time released capsules. He gave me to things … one was Daizepam, which helped me get through the court hearing (hearing? Lol) and the other was 40mg Propranalol to go with the 80mg Propranalol I already had. They were intended as an addition to the ones I already had.

Now I had taken these for a few nights then must have thought I was going somewhere overnight and put them on the inside of my jacket pocket. I then totally forgot all about them.

I am really, really bad at taking pills at night!

I am not that good at taking them in the morning either and mostly only remember if I am leaving the house as this seems to spark off something in my memory probably because I have now been doing it so long.

However all this was after running out and missing a pill and Friday night and Saturday morning I felt anxiety and panic. Hmm I am now remembering that someone referred to my anxiety attacks as panic attacks. A medical professional I think but as I have also experienced 'Fibromyalgia Rubber Legs' and it specifically states this is because of the strong anxiety that Fibromyalgia can cause then I can only assume that my description was correct.

Annnd this is how it has gone … up and down, up and down for week after week and month after month.

The other thing I do not talk about much is my appetite and I reckon I have lost more than a stone in weight in the first month alone. Trousers I previously could not get on me are now hanging on my hips, lol. This always happens when I have these attacks. It is really annoying for a number of reasons. Buy, hey? At least I spend less money!

It is strange when it happens. I go right off food and the only things that are tempting in any way are things that are not good for you, mostly, and too expensive to buy regularly. Except for one thing provided you do not do it every day.

This happened yesterday when I cycled past a Kentucky Fried Chicken on my way to Sainsburys, bought a loaf of bread and crab paste and then stopped at my local, not KFC, fried chicken shop on the way home.

I can often go a whole day without eating at all. Needless to say my weight is still coming off … just slower than it was previously.

Now added to this is my back pain which just like the head MRI and EEG an x-ray by the NHS found nothing, other than Ospteopenia. But then they went out of their way...no exaggeration, to lay me down on my side in a foetal position to x-ray someone's back? Funny as when a Chiropractor did it they did it standing up, weight bearing, and found not one but two things!

Hmm .. now THAT sounds familiar? If it does to you then you must have been checking back with this blog a few years and if you have you must have come across dozens of things that sounded familiar? Including things you remember later on appearing in the news?

Yeah well I had an ultrasound on my groin that when I saw the specialist he was “...pleased to tell you the ultrasound was completely clear”. My response was “Umm, what?! My ultrasound? The ultrasound I was PRESENT at?!” to which he then sat bolt upright before I continued “there was a black lump where I am experiencing the pain and a new inguinal hernia on the opposite side!”

I am not going to go into that in depth and how I was kicked off a GP Surgery that refused point blank to listen to the recording of the specialist admitting he falsified the test results.

So my back. I had been sleeping on my sofa for many weeks, something else I end up doing when the anxiety strikes. I managed to make my way back to my bed a few weeks ago. Then I started waking up in the morning with my back pain.

After several more days I started waking up in the middle of the night with my back pain.

The night before last I started to experience back pain before even falling asleep and I grabbed my bath robe, rolled it up and placed it under my right hip as I lied on my side to ease the pain, which it did.

When the pain strikes it does not matter whether I lie on my back or sides it is still aggravated but lying on my back it can be really bad.

Yeah my friend is right … there are a lot of things on my mind I am thinking and worried about that I should not be.

Being messed about and CONSTANTLY lied to by the NHS and its Doctors, while they are paid stupidly large salaries, is what really grates on me when I think now that they want to stand behind all disabled people with a whip!

A fucking WHIP is NOT what is needed. It is GENUINE help, are you reading this Scope? Either give people the medication they need or fund cars!

I need one of two things and I would be able to work full time and I have absolutely HATED not having anything to do! Really, really hated it. It sets of my depression if I am honest and all this has kept me out of aa close relationship for so long I can now never ever have another one.

Yes, that is how bad it has affected my own life … even told that … Judge that but she did not bat an eyelid! If you cannot use that as a damned good reason I simply do not know what you can use?!

I had thought I would get out of all this myself. That was the plan all of 2015 and my vision for 2016 was very, very different from what I ended up with. Such polar opposites it was almost as if it was by design?!

In fact almost every day of this year of 2016 I have told myself it was by design.

I should have been on top of the world and look at this post alone?

I do not possess any illusions to 2017 though the law of averages and little bits of information this year do suggest 2017 will be better?

Though at the moment I am wondering whether or not at some point I simply will not be able to sleep in a normal bed ever again.

Oh but then I can always go to the Doctors about that … oh wait?

THE FRUIT BEARING TREES

It is a tiring thought at all the ideas that I put into practise that I know will take time and effort but have trouble doing...enough.

I feel like I have been at mt blogs for half a lifetime and wonder to the day things will all fall into place?

It does not help that I have had an extrememly unproductive year and to give an idea of this my YouTube videos should number over 2,000 by now but hardly krept up from the 1,100 or so from one year ago. Considering my one YouTube account acts primarily as a back up for a dozen blogs on a dozen subjects, that...is...terrible! Lol.

I should have been in a very good position by now but due to one thing and another this has not quite reached the heady heights I wanted it to.

Now I have to admit that yes it still could have done. The factors that meddled with things could have been batted away with a simple swipe of the hand. But this would require....how do I put tthis? Help.

During 2015 this very notion of help...or really more correctly support, will become more prevalant and it is hard to explain why right now.

Much of things that I have said seem cryptic throughout the life of this blog and they were quite deliberately so. It might seem very long winded to many but this simply could not have been helped not just because of the size of the enemies I went up against but because of the people I have tried to convey all this too.

People to me seem to have a very difficult time comprehending proof put before them. Why? I simply do not know. If I did my life would have been so much simpler than it is and has been. If everything was easy and straightforawrd I would never, EVER have to have started this blog. By that I meant I simply only had to go to the news media and the job was done. I suspected, however, that they were corrupt also based purely on their respective owners so I could not rely on that.

They did as I feared they would do, nothing...nothing at all not even a letter to say I was a raving lunatic, lol. Hmm or an email as I contacted each and every one of the big names in both formats. It was merely a test to see what was what with the news media and I am afraid each and every one failed. The odd thing is I only ever had one conversation with what I had, prior to the blog of course, and that was with Max Clifford's secretary!

So yeah you could say that the corruption was spread wider than even I thought it had and people thought I was mad, lol. No just smart, able to see things others do not and...I like to think...a visionary. True that the jury is till out on this last one. Until 2015 I would wager?

I, rather annoyingly, do not work. Or to be more accuarate I do not have a job. As I said this is most annoying. I thought that working on this for so long it would feel like I had a job, was doing something, was contributing to society (you see that?!) and helping others. It does feel half the time like I am helping others. It does not, however, feel like a job. But then I am not entirely sure what a job is and whether its somethintg that suits me. I think a career would be more apt a term in this instance.

My point is, is that I have wanted to do something for sometime and I simply cannot find anything hat fits in with everything I have going on. I mean the health, the other rubbish and ... other things besides. A career is not the only thing that I cannot fit into this web of crap I call my life and many others are plainly obvious as you delved further into my older posts.

I thought now that the winter has arrived I would be planning out my next big thing knowing it was a full gone conclusion but as yet I am not. I have to hope that I have a good Spring and Summer 2015 and next year the nest things will be falling into place?

Of course next year means nearing 3.5 years and this opens up a whole new can of worms and then some. Three and a half years that all this has been made available along with anything else I have acquired in the next year. Hmm I could go after a follow up investigation to my knee? Oh, listen to me 'a follow up'? I forgot, they left that diagnosis out of the letter from Guy's Hospital and I have still YET to listen to the all important part of that recording?! Hmm hold up there a minute?!

Right a little work in progress here but I have am finally listening to the damned tape! Takes me soo long to get around to things ...

Currently having trouble pinpointing the yelling out due to knee but found that at...

38 minutes and 14 seconds that he mentions I have the knee problem.

Its annoying the quality could be better in places but I could hardly stop and say "Ooh just a minute while I just fiddle with the audio recorder I am secretly recording you with?

The intention was to get a letter to the GP that was different to what was said on the day. If no one had realised this, sorry I did think it was obvious and sorry if it was not.

OK I think I was looking in the wrong half of the recording, it is...errr over 55 minutes long and I did think it was in the last 10 or 20 minutes? It appears not! Looking like it will be about 20 minutes in, if that and I know this because I have just been asked to get undressed at 15 minutes in. He leaves the room at this point and towards 16 minutes I am having a chat with the trainee. That starts of clearer and then dulls a little but you can still hear what is being said. In fact with the right equpiment you can here everything I think. My audio gear is pretty good, but could be a lot better and I am playing it on two old Acoustic Energy Aego speakers which are diminutive in size but produce a good quality sound.

I talk about the book Figuring Out Fibromyalgia by Ginevra Liptan around 19 minutes into the recording and am still waiting to hear me yell out in pain. I should be hearing the words, please stiffen your legs?

God, how can the loudest sound be so bloody hard to find?! LMAO!

Thirty minutes in and it must be coming up?! I am, being asked to do things with me legs I remember and I was on the hospital bed laying down. Maybe I did not yell out as loud as I remember? Lol!

Found it!!

Bloody hell at long last, now let me just double check the time to exactly when in the recording?

At 31 minutes 26 seconds he asks me to stiffen my leg.

The yell is at 31 minutes and 31 seconds, he states I have a knee cap problem at 31 minutes 45 seconds.

In there somewhere he also does the same thing to my left knee and I am very wary about doing the same thing and getting the same amount of pain. However to me surprise it does not hurt at all?!

The same could not be said for the right knee though and it bloody well hurt like hell.

And NOW for those that did not want to download and listen through 56 minutes of boring banter here is, and finally though I promised months ago the edited portion of that I speak of above.

So to add to the Fibromyalgia the dozen pains I experience the other 100 annoying irritations from it, the vomiting and heartburn from the Hiatus Hernia and Oesophagitis that now needs investigating once again is the second spot of an NHS Doctor of my right knee problem.

Remember the first was Dr Saksena at Chase Farm Hospital and I then ended up with a rather rude, thinking himself scary while still suffereing from delusions of grandeur, Dr Tai and the cancelled MRI for the right knee because they said I did not turn up, a LIE, and then when referred to Barnet Hospital they ignored it and WRONGLY looked at my feet, wrongly x-rayed me as if I was an idiot and then WRONGLY diagnosed it and disagreed with me on something that is well documented...

Here is the 'You have a knee problem!' I still cannot hear what he says and think now he never mentioned it so ...

http://www.wuala.com/allnights/Evidence/NHS/Guys%20KNEE%20PROB.mp3/

Now I do seem to be asble to find the test that he did which seems to be the same except it states nothing about pain in the test, no matter how many times I find and read about it.

Lachman test is the name it appears to be called but it states nothing about pain but does state that the Doctor will place his hand on your lower thigh just above your knee. Sometimes it states that the knee is bent and I could be wrong but I am pretty sure my leg was straight when this was done?

http://www.webmd.com/pain-management/knee-pain/physical-examination-of-the-knee

The pivot-shift test, anterior drawer test and Lachman test are used during the clinical examination of suspected ACL injury. The Lachman test is recognized by most authorities as the most reliable and sensitive test, and usually superior to the anterior drawer test.^[13] The ACL can also be visualized using a magnetic resonance imaging scan (MRI scan).

An ACL tear can present with a popping sound heard after impact, swelling after a couple of hours, severe pain when bending the knee, and buckling or locking of the knee during movement.

Though clinical examination in experienced hands can be accurate, the diagnosis is usually confirmed by MRI, which has greatly lessened the need for diagnostic arthroscopy and which has a higher accuracy than clinical examination. It may also permit visualization of other structures which may have been co-incidentally involved, such as a meniscus, or collateral ligament, or posterolateral corner of the knee joint.

- Wikipedia; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anterior_cruciate_ligament_injury

The term for non-surgical treatment for ACL rupture is "conservative management", and it often includes physical therapy and using a knee brace. Instability associated with ACL deficiency increases the risk of other knee injuries such as a torn meniscus, so sports with cutting and twisting motions are problematic and surgery is often recommended in those circumstances.

- Wikipedia; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anterior_cruciate_ligament_injury

Now if you have not followed the letter I got from this Doctor Kirkham from Guy's Hospital did not state a single thing about the knee, the test of it nor the pain I experienced from the test on my right knee. This right knee is one that I have given details of previously and several people were present when I did the major thing and it 'popped'. It may have been present previous to this I simply cannot remember. That popping took place over ten years ago because my father was present at the time.

The letter, laso to be found on here, also did not state that which he did at the appointment in that he had no problems telling my Doctor to prescribe Pregabalin.

I still have not been put on it but then I have not asked my current GP about it and decided to give a combination of Gabapentin and Amitriptyline a go first, though Dr Kirkham stated that I could take the Amirtriptyline with the Pregabalin.

GMC COINCIDENCES

Well look at that!

Just a few posts back I thought how peculiar it was that the story about the warning about NHS and the mental health crisis, my letter from the GP falsely accusation me and this story regarding the General Medical Council?

Now what was it I stated in another very recent post?

They poo up to state the painfully obvious?!

Lol.

Doctor complaints 'rising steeply' http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-24534273