ONGOING REVELATIONS

I have come by more information regarding the Department of Work and Pensions and yet not found anything out just yet about a programme that was on TV about this.

There was a major feck up by my Job Centre. Last week after leaving the JSA lady and exiting the building an unknown number rang my phone. When I answered it was the lady I had just met on the third floor, she told me the system had double booked an appointment and could they move it forward several hours.

When I got in their this week someone went and sat down with the woman I thought I was seeing and I started to get confused and then wondered if they had booked me with someone else and did not tell me?

Eventually I was called by a lady I met once before and who I got chatting with about orchids. At first she did not remember me but when I mentioned the orchids she did. We got chatting and she told me that no one there agrees with what the DWP are doing or their attitudes towards benefit claimants. She even told me that she was told at times that she herself was too soft with claimants?!

She went on to say that the Job Centre was run really badly and that it never used to be like that and I explained what happened with the mess up with the appointment. I also even told her about my disagreement with the DWP and that I should not be going there and have been told as much and that there is a legal battle about to go on. She raised an eyebrow and said “Really?” and I told her that being shunted onto JSA did not mean a great deal to me when it happened as I had long wanted to find something to do part-time anyway.

I was surprised for the second time about someone being so candid with me and I told her that I had already been told this by a chap in the floor beneath her in Universal Credit and she was surprised to hear this despite knowing who I was talking about.

I asked her about the programme on TV and told her my landlord had mentioned it but she knew nothing about it either.

I am starting to wonder whether it was some brief TV news report somewhere but I am sure the word 'documentary' was mentioned?

It was admitted to me that the whole thing was a screw up on just about every level and that many of the staff did not know whether they were coming or going half the time.

I pointed out how there are now 6 departments where there were only three and that they now intend to make these six departments into just one and she glared at me and said “I knooow!” lol.

There is one thing I did not mention at the Job Centre and regarding my health conditions, that of the pills they have refused me for years. The drugs. Now that I have mentioned this I cannot even remember if I have mentioned this on my blog. The drugs … or at least what has happened recently over these drugs.

Best three drugs for Fibromyalgia Syndrome in order of effectiveness …

• Sodium Oxybate – Xyrem and the only one to deal with the source problem of non-restorative sleep
• Milnacipran – Seems to be specific to the pain receptor fired off in Fibromyalgia so sounding like an accidental discovery?
• Pregabalin

Which of these do I get?

NONE OF THEM!

Yup you read that right … none of them.

But wait a minute? Are they not now trying to force me into full time work? Yup. But they refuse to give me the drugs that could, with two, ,and WOULD, with one, ,make almost all my symptoms disappear overnight. Except my back problem that they had also lied about and despite having nmy own x-rays of that are on this blog!

Oops!

Except … as it turned out several people I know actually take Pregabalin, a better version of my Gabapentin, and were so shocked to hear my stories of refusal and being kicked off surgeries and falsifying documents that someone … donated some of theirs for me to try. Lol.

Now just last night I was asked if I was going to try them straight away and I said I did not know and they got annoyed with me, stating that I said I had wanted them for so long.

I then pointed out two things … that they may force me into full time work before long and if I take them and they do work there is absolutely no guarantee that my GP will give me them and that his brother, my previous GP, and my two previous GP's at two previous practices had ALSO both refused me Pregabalin over a five year period.

In other words these pills are precious to me, which is really odd as I have no idea if they will work or not, and that they may be the only ones I get in a long while, as getting them is likely to lead to me … changing to my sixth GP practice in Enfield. Do not doubt that last statement … I have already been through five in the same catchment area without moving home and I know how this always goes. An argument too start with and then all hell breaks loose, lol. Plus there is no guarantee I will get the prescription from the NEXXT GP either!

BUT … going though all that will be worth if for one reason and one reason only … the gloves will be off, a heap of stuff winds up on my blog and I guarantee that this time around the blogs will actually make some money for the first time ever and become regular before long. So there is that! Lol.

Sooo what I will do is try them for a week but check how I have to come off Gabapentin first before going on the infamous Pregabalin.

Then there is Christmas … this time it is going to be an even more lonely one than it normally is but I am used to that … mostly.

Had a bust up with the one I normally am at, at Christmas time and so I have gotten out of hearing a load of crap but not being preoccupied by others.

Yes it seems to be always happening and al happening of late and there is plenty of signs it will stay like this until the Spring?

Oddly enough the one thing I thought would happen in November which was potentially the biggest of al the things that could happen did not happen. But yeah I have kind of gotten used to that too the only thing is that this failed a year ago and the trouble it caused me could well have happened all over again. Well it kinda did as this was what I got into an argument about after finally divulging to someone I told a couple of others to keep in the dark about. Yeeah … that did not go well land I got the usual narcissistic attitude with flailing arms and a brick wall. Despite the fact that you are NOT ALLOWED under ANY CIRCUSMTANCES to EVER DO THAT TO THEM! Otherwise everyone gets to hear about it for 5 to 10 years.

Their reasons are always valid while yours are not … she fits the profile of an Social Justice Warrior to a 'T' and even thinks of themselves as a socialist, lol.

Oh yup I did not know that Social Justice Warriors were a thing until recently but that does not mean I have not heard some of the bat-shit crazy ideas beforehand and I have from right within my own family! They have changed their minds on some things bat-shit crazy but not on others and still even on the things they changed their minds about still goes into that whole socialism lecture based on half-truths and bullshit! Now THAT I and we have had for around 20 years plus.

What they do not know is that my counsellor blames them for several of my … let us say limitations? I do not but I could see why she said them and there may well be a contribution but … no.

My condition of Fibromyalgia Syndrome is the cause of the actual problems but there may well be an argument that this family member has contributed in some way? Oh yeah they certainly make it worse and no one stops and says to them, when they are crying to everyone else for sympathy, well you should not DO that with him. What they do is downright bloody rude to any normal person and the fact that they do it with someone with a known memory problem just makes it ten times worse than it otherwise would be.

They will think of something they want to talk about when your telling your anecdotes and feel it is so important they will interrupt you, which is rude before anything else is considered.

You will try to stop them and point out their story is not relevant to what you were just talking about and to win the argument and gain control of the floor they will say “Because you have not let me finish!” What should take five minutes then takes 30 minutes or more and when finished guess what? It still bears no relevance to what I was just talking about and she insists that it does. Well maybe in your warped world it does but to everyone else and that is what matters, it DOES NOT!

But despite that looking ad it is never that simple as when they talk they then meander off moist of the time to another subject and then another. So you have been interrupted and with a really bad memory problem forced to wait for like an hour or even more until they have told you several stories, none of which are relevant.

In my recent row they turned to their partner and some point and said “What was I saying just now?” and to show you as I told my counsellor that they just do not get it … their partner answered “I don't know, first you was talking about one thing ,then you started talking about something else and then moved onto something else!”

Did this person even show a face that she had just been shown up and proved to be in the wrong by their own partner? Umm NO!

What really gets my goat up is afterwords … I am the villain!

But let us recount points and summarise?

• You interrupted … which is rude so in the wrong immediately
• You spoke about something not relevant to that you subject you interrupted so wrong number TWO (example interrupt explanation on CRPS because this most painful condition has the word 'complex' in it and their unproven epilepsy is … umm … complex!)
• I get annoyed because it is rude and I suffer from memory loss, both well known facts but I am the villain, LMAO!

Does that sound like a Social Justice Warrior much?

The truth is ignored because what they think and feel is more important and relevant.

I have had friends meet them and apologise to me because they thought my description is unfair when the truth is both they and other people run when they see her coming. I have known this to occur with one man and two separate women. Reason? “If that woman seems me she will come straight over, complain bout her kids and how they cause her terrible stress for two or three hour straight!” Yeah … literally run!”

I forgot … there is one other person that fell out with them … their own cousin and over the exact same thing.

This is the bit I tell other family members I simply do not get … they fall out with everyone but it is NEVER EVER their fault. In fact when it was their cousin she lied about it for a couple of years,, in an argument I told them I knew the truth. They leave it for a year like you have a memory like a sieve and then go back to telling the story, how stressful it was and back to telling the same lies about it.

I caught my Mind counsellor with her mouth open a little in shock and she went on to say that this must have been a dreadful thing to bear for such a long time and I simply smiled and said “Yeah, it has been”.

And it was over someone else who has let me down yet again … promising two things and failing to deliver on either promise. Go figure?

So my counsellor figured out why I have trust issues while she wondered why I even started bothering blogging to help others? I told her that I had asked myself that on many, many occasions. But at the end of the day it was still the right and honourable thing to do and I keep telling myself that there must be people out there WORTH helping even if I never see any evidence of that or very rarely do.

It is also all that I have.

After all I am only five years away from being on top of the ages that both my father and Uncle died and did not want to leave this life leaving nothing in the way of a legacy behind.

The faint hope that I could make people see and point them in the right directions and thought patterns that may change a country and maybe … just maybe … in time a world?

A first video on YouTube in awhile … the Pregabalin tablets and a recap of what I experienced with three separate GP Surgeries in Enfield and how and why I was not given these pills …