Well the milder and drier weather did not last that long!
Dog gone it!! LOL!
It is Sunday and I have had another stab at doing some cleaning and clearing in the hope that one morning soon I can look at it and see that it would not take me long to finish it?! That is how I end up tackling my household chores. Also and as annoying as it has always been I now realise I am likely not alone in this?!
Ever since I stumbled upon Fibromyalgia every now and then I read something else that is so typically me, it has all felt rather uncanny in all honesty. In a nice and relieveing way too!
Only I now think how different things would have been had I known this ten years ago?! Things would be most certainly very different I assure you and being attacked and defrauded by bailiffs would most certainly not have happened?!
So as a result I have periods of the year I absolutely hate and those I absolutely love. Mind you in all honesty the one that I hate can have a positive effect on me. But it did not this year.
I have stated it from day one and that is I hate the winter and it feels as if I am imprisoned quite literally. This year has been the worst in a long time and despite people saying, well at least it did not snow, I always say that is typical of people that drive and take things for granted. I then explain that when it snows those of us confined to being on foot or bike do not get wet. Getting wet in the winter months is dreadful. There is also that tiny window in the temperature where you can get wet and the wind can be quite devastating. I am sure the poor members of the American public have been finding that one out! In more ways then one too?!
This there has been no snow this year in the UK in the south at all, despite being told umpteenth times there was a humongous amount coming. No we just had lots of bloody rain, wind and gloomy weather! Give me snow any day of the week! Even with wind too you can give me snow, though below about minus 8 centigrade it might not be too fun. As to the tempratures they have experienced in the US then oh no my word that would be a living nightmare.
What I love about the snow is how everything looks beautiful and as selfish as I sound there is far less traffic and noise! Something I have come to hate about London for a very long time and hence how I have spent years trying to escape it, still yet to actually make it out! Sod Escape from New York, try Escaping London?!
What is hilarious about this is that local government would love to hand things to you on a plate to get rid of you but this involves moving 200 miles away. You get your pick of anywhere except that it is all over 200 miles away?! Well ALMOST anywhere, lol.
Also the period is more troublesome for me and more painful as a result of all this. SO I await the fairer weather each Spring while at the same time paanicking about being fit enough to start escaping to my favourite haunts?! So trying to capitaluse I await breaks in the wather while it is still cold!
This is where I am at right now and I cannot remember s single time when glancing at the weather reports on my phone has been so bloody miserable! Lol! I also cannot remember a time when the Met Office in the UK has been so horribly wrong anywhere near as often as they have been the last year?!
If other Fibromyalgia sufferes have done the same thing as me and taken up cycling, if you can do that without pain then I really do envy you, they must all be doing the same thing?! Mind you their destination might be very different to mine and added to that to feel as I do they must also have been neglected and cast off by their local government and society as I have done.
I stated to a friend f mine just yesterday something that I found which I had forgotten to mention to him and I have done this a few times the last week. I stated that I had read that Fobromyalgia sufferers have difficulty being bored. Now oddly enough this makes me remember that when I mention ony of the symptoms the response can be 'Oh well but I get like that too!' to which I then realise they are simply not thinking. It is still that 'It is not a real condition!' kind of statement and it truly is a let down. I mean I could shoot anyone down in flames like that and make them look and feel really stupid.
Well of course everyone else feels like that but for Fibromyalgia sufferers it affects us more so than the average person and they should tey and think about that. I said to my friend that it states that we need to have things in the home to occupy ourselves and not only have I stated this for years it is what drives me every single day. I have stated within the pages of this blog that I even worry that if I acquire that which I want will the feelings end?!
Because it is NOT like that of others.
This is where the depression and the ansity side of it come into play and the boredom can lead to these and the whole thing can spiral out of control! Unless you have spent years in some of the worst places imagineable and survived to tell the tale?! Survived to show and help others and they need not be Fibromyalgia sufferers to be able to gain help from me. Like people like to remind me of the obvious when your trying to explain something is that we all suffer from these emotions and pains. But with Fibromyalgia it seems like its everything at once up to 18 hous a day and sometimes 24 hours a day too.
The simple fact is that if they listened instead of wanting to be the one speaking when its actually our story to tell they would realise that Fibromyalgia is down to two things...
- The lack of proper sleep which can ONLY be put right with one drug in existence (I recently had someone else diagree and claim that other drugs can put me to sleep, umm NO but I do wish you were right, lol)
- The scrambling up of the signals to the brain.
I can now list two things that can directly link to the above two and that it is these that non-sympathisers out there need to realise before openeing the floodgates...
- You wake up every morning as if you have just run a marathon and everything is stiff, and I mean REALLY STIFF where your hobbling about!! Still feel tired too!
- The scrambling of signals affects everything!! Think of it as like someone who is paralysed from the neck down. Now imagine the polar opposite of that where all the same partts can feel too much which can vary from ild discomfort to severe pain?!
Now with THAT in mind then you go and read the list of up 200 symptoms that Fibromyalgia sufferes have to deal with! In my case it numbers around the 120 mark and I do not know if this will be considered to be a sever case or not. However as about 20 or so of the symptoms and specifically for the female of the species I would say my count os fairly high, lmao!
Switching to the use of the bike each year does two things for me. I have to deal with different pains to that I get on foot but it is easier than on foot nevertheless. It also allows those pains I get on foot to get a break meaning that when I am it is less problematic.
Not gone, I wish, just less problematic! If they were gone I would be cycling about in the winter too, SOD THE SNOW AND ICE!! LMAO!
The pther thing is that I do suffer from SAD, seasonal affective disorder and I would imagine many Fobromyalgia sufferers do. But in the warmer weather and sunlight I am off into the wilderness during the day for hours on end and I do feel great comfort most of the time and with many reasons for it to!
I feel as if I have escaped and in all honesty ever since the bailiffs attacked me and defrauded me I do not like being in the house. Something ELSE I hate about the winter!!
However I have gotten fed up with telling friends 'oh this weather cannot last much longer? Surely in another week we will be out the other side of it?' and annoyingly I heard a few days ago that the cold was returning to the US?! I thought that this was bad as it was highly likely that if it did one of two things would happen...
- The never ending downpurs would return or...
- We would be frozen and buried in snow too?!
It is these things in meteorology that are difficult tp predict as the weather and wind that hit us was turbulence of warm and cols fronts. It may not have felt like it but the wind we was hit with was a damn site warmer than that in America! Now all that air shot north so would have cooled down a fair amount and I do not know how much warmer air is left and even if there is enough to blast us again or what the rations of warm and cold aire needs to be?!
I do not recall hearing anything in the last 24 hours regarding freezing temperatures in America so hope that this was a false alarm. However I have been told a coupld of times the last few days that they are predicting snow for the UK. So I assume that because people I know outside of the Internet told me this I can only assume that this was for London?
I have to admit that the mentioning of another way below zero blast of air in America or even here in the UK seems a bit weird as it is now officially Spring! I do know that it can snow right into late February but it is now the 2nd March and these have been predictions coming to me!
The reason I am pondering these things as I type is that the thought of going months before being able to get on my bike is....frightening! The thought of never getting to use it all all during 2014 would be catastrophic for me!
So I keep waiting, looking and keeping an ear out for some good news on the weather front, sorry bad pun. I dare say that I am joined by millions now awaiting this news?!
When I left the house yesterday I thought I was overdoing ot by putting fingeless gloves on as just a few days before I could not even wear a thin jacket without boiling up?! I was wrong and it felt so cold which was unsusal for me and I would not have been surprised at all if it had snowed.
If anyone says it is too cold to snow I will blow off a shed load of steam, let me tell you! LOL!
With a crap Sring and Summer I do not know where or how I am going to keep myself occupied and this is worrying for me?! However, maybe and it is a slim outside chance that the DWP and their new PIPs Department may decide to stop fecking around with me and do what they should have done four years ago?! NoTEN years ago when I first asked them, which was two years after finding it increasingly harder to walk?!
LOL! A chance would be a fine thing!
On another note on pain someone I know has a donation group going with making the invisibilty of pain visible to all. It seems to be Australian based so not sure if it can raise awareness with other countries, but HEY someone has to pioneer an idea like this to begin with, right?!