Despite sounding like a morbid and whinging old sod I would like to say that really I am not.
I have 11 other blogs that are much more light hearted but the truth is that we are entering into an abyss and even being led there by none other than the Pied Pipers.
The sad reality is that someone has to do it and no one is, despite having all the fact presented to them, so I am doing it. It was what was asked of me by many, one on his death bed, and therefore i am doing as was requested.
I know what is going to come very, very soon and when it does and wherever it comes from it will set me off. I now that me being me being set off will come at some point but I do not know WHO will do it nor WHEN it will happen but judging from what I am seeing, hearing and reading it IS coming.
Now to skirt around this ... issue I will explain that today I was playing a game while thinking about whether to venture out to acquire milk and margarine and a prime example of how venturing out is difficult for me as that even though I limit the amount of things I bring back, therefore meaning many more trips than the average person, I will end up forgetting something and sometimes bring back things I had not intended. Sometimes these purchases are beneficial to my work and other times they are not, today I have a representative of BOTH cases and they are of the same ORDER?! Both are magazines?!
I will explain at the end and how you pay for services to companies that you do not get and how that ends up costing you an extra outlay but no one in government of local government will give a rat's arse about that unless it is THEM that is paying out extra even when it could have been easily avoided. My word I am spiralling all over the place like I often do...
...well that is because they have created such a fecking mess in each area and have ignored my warnings for years as they just think I am incompetent and only they have any intelligence. Not like that now is it you JACK-ASSES?!
Anyway while pondering this retrieval of just two items I get a call from my sister. She says at one point "Oh Mum struck again last night!" and I reply "Go on..."
It turns out that due to it being Mother's Day (is it?! lol) my sister who has spent years trying to appease our mother and for our mother to use it and abuse it she went down there with her boyfriend. It actually turns out that due to last time they were there and the visit I had from my sister and her boyfriend, that the said boyfriend was now really nervous about going there. Poor bastard!! I laughed when she said this.
Anyway they went and she started. Turns out I am the villain now and it was I that started all that fiasco that went on last time and I am the sole reason why one sibling is not talking to my sister, another brother and myself. My sister tried to defend me and as usual, and as I do, she was lambasted for doing this. Then she tells my sister that I said all these derogatory things about my sister and I said "well wait a minute, did she not moan to you before that I was defending you?!" and my sister said "yes I know and even [BF] said after that while he was hearing this he was thinking no your a liar, Martin has not done anything of the kind"
She said the [BF] was absolutely shocked and did not think he could be after last time they were there?! I laughed at this. My sister explained that she was depressed and having some real difficulties and that she was not going to deal with her any more and cut off and I said that I knew it would come to this one day. I said that I had said this before on many occasions but that with 4 other siblings not wanting to cut off it gets ... difficult.
At one point my mother turned around and said... "Right I am giving you your Christmas presents back as I do not want anything off you and that if there had been MONEY in the Christmas Cards I WOULD HAVE KEPT IT!"
This not only disgusted my sister by her BF was taken aback a fair bit. I said that this made no fecking sense and that why would she say that at all?! I then found out my sister visited out grandmother, also somewhat mad, and that she went on started crying and then, not sure of exact details yet, threatened her BF physically?! You could argue that in her 80's she is just loosing her marbles but when I was 14 she attacked me and she was in her fifties meaning she has been losing them a long time.
So just to recap my mother is the ONLY person in my ENTIRE FAMILY, including the branch in Southend, that lives in social housing. She is there with a man she sleeps apart form in a separate room and has TWO sons living there and it is a 3 bedroom house.
I will let readers do the maths?!
The only one and the number of times have heard form Civil Servants, well go and live with your mother, when I have been homeless I have lost count of but I assure you of this...the NEXT TIME it is said to me they will awake to find themselves on an intravenous drip!
I want to take the government to court to state that mad people should be sterilised and not be allowed to breed if they cannot fucking give a shit about anyone but themselves?!
It would have certainly saved me a great of pain and heart ache!!
We got cut off so I did not hear it all and I logged off Windows 7 and ventured out to a busy Sainsburys, forgetting it was mother's day...AGAIN, and then ended up with Micro Mart Magazine, I will read shortly, at £2.25 and the realised that there was a Computer Active special on free software and that it continued the latest Open Office on a disk which is free and had a whole list of other things besides. Now Open Office is free, therefore free to download, but as with all Office Software Suites in recent years there size is...substantial to say the least!
Now back onto my not so BROAD band mobile connection which goes on and off and makes snails appear to be travelling forwards in time?! Need I say more?
So now I have to check the data on my main drive, which is 320GB and was supposed to be a 320GB SSD with a 500GB HDD but due to all in this blog went out the window, lol pardon the pun!
So from now on if anyone in authority asks abut my mother to save from hitting them I will simply say... I HAVE NO PARENTS as this is the TRUTH. To be a parent you therefore have to do the things a parent does and shoe does not do ANY OF THE IMPORTANT ONES!
I also STILL want to see this GP letter that states "PROBABLE EPILEPSY"?! But then my mother would not have bothered reading it and assumed it was a passport to no end of sympathy and therefore imply shoved it into our faces...that is until someone no doubt mentioned back to her that it clearly states PROBABLE epilepsy, no GRAND-MAL REMEMBER?! They might have even gone as far as stating that she therefore LIED when she said she had been DIAGNOSED WITH EPILEPSY and possible that they had defended her to me when I had told them, as i did all of them, that she was LYING and did not have it at all. Someone mentioned it, it sounded exotic so show clutched onto it with both hands. But a friend of hers is Grand-mal and despite stating it was not nice to have lectured the man's wife when she screamed the place down when her husband had one of his seizures.
But now my mother CLAIMS to have these MILD seizures and the WORLD HAS TO STOP SPINNING!
It also does not matter WHAT you are going through or WHAT your ailments are and that includes severe injuries operations or anything else she will absoluteness and unequivocally render them all meaningless nothings! Mountain out of Mole Hill does not even BEGIN to describe what my mother is capable of doing and has done all our lives.
WE HAVE NO PARENTS AND HAVE NOT DONE SINCE MY FATHER DIED!!
That was 9 years ago!
I am glad I am the villain! Takes heat away from others, err or so I thought it would, and means she will not come here again, until she finds an excuse to come, stop me from telling her about any major operations, diagnosis, deaths or anything else because she needs to tell me for the fifty thousandth time about how serious the epilepsy she does not have actually is!
My sister also tells me that she has been given BETA-BLOCKERS by someone to calm her down as she has been having panic attacks?! There are many other issues too and she resides in my grandparents home currently with her boyfriend which is where I lived many years on and off.
Now here is a PRIME EXAMPLE where over and over and OVER AGAIN a bunch of overpaid civil servants and so-called experts have failed my family time and time and TIME AGAIN!!!
1) We have no fecking idea WHAT is going on with our mother and this has gone on for twenty years!!
2) My sister has had to be given BETA BLOCKERS by someone OTHER THAN A DOCTOR because the entire NHS is nothing more than a luging stck of greedy corporate people being paid hundreds thousands pounds for fucking years.
3) NOT ONE single social housing accommodation has been awarded to any one of 12 members of my family?! NOT ONE!!
But I REALISE THIS!
I can SEE THIS!
I KNOW WHO IS TO BLAME!
But it unfortunately seems that for the longest time I have been in the tiniest minority!
I now believe that this ceases to be in the coming months!
I strongly feel that the people solely responsible for this do not deserve to breath the same air as he rest us DECENT HONEST AND LAW ABIDING members of society!
I once stated that I am DEAD AGAINST THE TAKING OF INNOCENT HUMAN LIVES?!
But I do not see these people are neither INNOCENT or indeed HUMAN! LMAO!